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She's Inhuman!
The Journal of a Mechanized Subservient
This journal may contain adult concepts.
Created on 2002-10-24 23:30:17 (#752188), last updated 2009-11-11
3,895 comments received, 3,989 comments posted
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2,182 Journal Entries, 509 Tags, 31 Memories, 60+ ScrapBook Files, 0 Virtual Gifts, 28 Userpics
Basic Info| Name: | Phreaky McPhreak |
|---|---|
| Birthdate: | 1977-06-12 |
| Location: | Lewisburg, Tennessee, United States |
BioI got tired of my old profile and the shit that was splattered all over it. I decided it was time to grab some Charmin® and wipe it off. Enjoy!
I was going to put in a lot of graphical eyecandy like most of you, but then decided against it. See, nothing pisses me off more than having to wait for a profile to load up because there are far too much shit strewn all over, mostly quizzes, and I have to wait forever and a day just to be able to load anything. I thought about it and decided that if it pisses me off, and I have high-speed internet, it is more than likely it would piss off more people than you would think. So, why should I bother with adding a lot of visual graphics around when words are just as good? Don't believe that shit about a picture speaking a thousand words - I have a thousand words I can shove up that tight little hole of yours if that is your desire.
Now, don't go off saying that I am nothing but a foul-mouthed pervert with a taste for the sadistic pleasure of royally pissing people off. I do that naturally, I don't have to try. Why fight off what you are born with? All you will get are headaches the size of Christopher COlumbus's Nina. I wonder how Columbus's nana dealt with his analness, though. Hrm. Thoughts to ponder!
I could tell you everything you need to know about me right here, but seriously, who the hell would really give a good goddamn? I should just have said "Who the fuck cares, and if you gave a damn, you would ask!" I don't condone bullshit like that. It is a profile, which means it is for you to fill up with information about yourself, not to force us to ask about you in order to get anywhere. Frankly, having to have to ask who a person is rather than to have the information on hand right when we want it is more intolerable. Hence, I fall into the trend of telling you all about myself. I am such a fucking hypocrite.
I don't have to tell you again that I am a female. Oh wait, I just did. So much for my not having to repeat myself - I end up doing it anyway. The reason for the emphasis? Because every one is always thinking I am a lowly ball-scratching fingernail-sniffing gas-emitting male! It has something to do with my userID. Well, I got news for you - I use this userID everywhere. Well, most anywhere I am registered on. I even own a shirt with my name on it. I will tell you how I came to get this shirt, and I'm sure many of you would want one of your own. Don't. It is not cool to be a lemming, regardless of what people may try to say. It is always great to lead, but never to follow. And if you think walking side-by-side would be any different, you, my friend, are dead wrong. That is just as bad as following! You must always aim to be ahead, and run like hell if you have to. If you are slow, and your "sidekick" is faster, well then, you're flat out of luck. You probably were never meant to be the leader, anyway.
Oh wow, I do tend to digress. I need to quit doing that. It isn't doing me any good, and chances are, my ratings would drop faster than a fly on LSD. I'm so good at what I do, aren't I....
I will leave this for now, but do be expecting me to write more bullshit around here in the near future. As long as I am not trying to learn how to munch carpet and braid hair like a a motherfucker just to stay alive in a penitentiary. Not that I have any reason to be heading off into the world of bars and oh-my-god-don't-bend-over-for-that-soap! Nope. Yep. I'm a perfectly good angel, huh-huh!
Update**
Holy batman bullshit! I had this neat new section all typed up for this profile, and I managed to lose it by hitting the back button of my mouse, so I was forced back to where I started. Of all things, this had to happen! I was quite pleased with what I had managed to put down, too. I'M GONNA KILL SOMEONE!
*ahem*
Nah. I'm a peaceful creature. But if you fuck with me, I'll kill you!!! **
**That, of course, is a parody for most new profiles. Have you noticed the ever-growing trend? It's sickening. Thus, I must mock it!**
Now, let me see what it is that I had tried to type down. Something about my twat slithering around on the floor in search of manfood.... Er, and possession, and bonobo sex. Oh hell, I no longer remember. Shit on me.
No, don't do that. That's sick, that sciatophiliac shit. Wait, isn't that a bit redundant? BWAHAH!
*mutter*
I think I need to shut up before I end up sounding like some raving lunatic from the ghetto part of Queens, NY.
Which reminds me, I did mention something about my stamina. See, I'm this tough bitch, with steel fists to match, imitiating gangsta bitches from Queens. But the truth is, inside, I am this sniveling little shit. I shake in my booties when someone so much as flicks a booger at me. Well, I will flick a lodger back, but I'd still shake.
I'm cool like that, RAWR!
Relationship status: Single. When I tell you that no one can handle me, you had better believe it!
Self: No improvements. I'm still as ruthlessly blunt and rude as ever.
Why I Am Doing This: Because I have nothing better to do. Why the hell are you even wondering?!
I was going to put in a lot of graphical eyecandy like most of you, but then decided against it. See, nothing pisses me off more than having to wait for a profile to load up because there are far too much shit strewn all over, mostly quizzes, and I have to wait forever and a day just to be able to load anything. I thought about it and decided that if it pisses me off, and I have high-speed internet, it is more than likely it would piss off more people than you would think. So, why should I bother with adding a lot of visual graphics around when words are just as good? Don't believe that shit about a picture speaking a thousand words - I have a thousand words I can shove up that tight little hole of yours if that is your desire.
Now, don't go off saying that I am nothing but a foul-mouthed pervert with a taste for the sadistic pleasure of royally pissing people off. I do that naturally, I don't have to try. Why fight off what you are born with? All you will get are headaches the size of Christopher COlumbus's Nina. I wonder how Columbus's nana dealt with his analness, though. Hrm. Thoughts to ponder!
I could tell you everything you need to know about me right here, but seriously, who the hell would really give a good goddamn? I should just have said "Who the fuck cares, and if you gave a damn, you would ask!" I don't condone bullshit like that. It is a profile, which means it is for you to fill up with information about yourself, not to force us to ask about you in order to get anywhere. Frankly, having to have to ask who a person is rather than to have the information on hand right when we want it is more intolerable. Hence, I fall into the trend of telling you all about myself. I am such a fucking hypocrite.
I don't have to tell you again that I am a female. Oh wait, I just did. So much for my not having to repeat myself - I end up doing it anyway. The reason for the emphasis? Because every one is always thinking I am a lowly ball-scratching fingernail-sniffing gas-emitting male! It has something to do with my userID. Well, I got news for you - I use this userID everywhere. Well, most anywhere I am registered on. I even own a shirt with my name on it. I will tell you how I came to get this shirt, and I'm sure many of you would want one of your own. Don't. It is not cool to be a lemming, regardless of what people may try to say. It is always great to lead, but never to follow. And if you think walking side-by-side would be any different, you, my friend, are dead wrong. That is just as bad as following! You must always aim to be ahead, and run like hell if you have to. If you are slow, and your "sidekick" is faster, well then, you're flat out of luck. You probably were never meant to be the leader, anyway.
Oh wow, I do tend to digress. I need to quit doing that. It isn't doing me any good, and chances are, my ratings would drop faster than a fly on LSD. I'm so good at what I do, aren't I....
I will leave this for now, but do be expecting me to write more bullshit around here in the near future. As long as I am not trying to learn how to munch carpet and braid hair like a a motherfucker just to stay alive in a penitentiary. Not that I have any reason to be heading off into the world of bars and oh-my-god-don't-bend-over-for-that-soap! Nope. Yep. I'm a perfectly good angel, huh-huh!
Update**
Holy batman bullshit! I had this neat new section all typed up for this profile, and I managed to lose it by hitting the back button of my mouse, so I was forced back to where I started. Of all things, this had to happen! I was quite pleased with what I had managed to put down, too. I'M GONNA KILL SOMEONE!
*ahem*
Nah. I'm a peaceful creature. But if you fuck with me, I'll kill you!!! **
**That, of course, is a parody for most new profiles. Have you noticed the ever-growing trend? It's sickening. Thus, I must mock it!**
Now, let me see what it is that I had tried to type down. Something about my twat slithering around on the floor in search of manfood.... Er, and possession, and bonobo sex. Oh hell, I no longer remember. Shit on me.
No, don't do that. That's sick, that sciatophiliac shit. Wait, isn't that a bit redundant? BWAHAH!
*mutter*
I think I need to shut up before I end up sounding like some raving lunatic from the ghetto part of Queens, NY.
Which reminds me, I did mention something about my stamina. See, I'm this tough bitch, with steel fists to match, imitiating gangsta bitches from Queens. But the truth is, inside, I am this sniveling little shit. I shake in my booties when someone so much as flicks a booger at me. Well, I will flick a lodger back, but I'd still shake.
I'm cool like that, RAWR!
Relationship status: Single. When I tell you that no one can handle me, you had better believe it!
Self: No improvements. I'm still as ruthlessly blunt and rude as ever.
Why I Am Doing This: Because I have nothing better to do. Why the hell are you even wondering?!
ConnectInterests (41):
a perfect circle, animals, arthur rimbaud, blogging, books, bruce sterling, chess, cigarettes, coffee, comedy, computers, d/s, edgar allan poe, gothic, heathers, horror, houston astros, houston texans, icp, internet, khaled hosseini, m*a*s*h, metallica, movies, music, neil gaiman, oklahoma sooners, philosophy, poppy z. brite, psychological horror, sarcasm, secretary, sex, social work, sociology, steampunk, susan kay, sylvia plath, tool, v.c. andrews, william gibson
External Services:
 | hellsphreak@livejournal.com | |
 | PhreaksDisguises |  |
 | hellsphreak | |
 | hellsphreak@hotmail.com | LJ Messenger Status: offline |
 | hellsphreak | |
Schools:
Fulmore Middle School - Austin, TXHill College - Cleburne, TX
Stripling Middle School - Fort Worth, TX
Stephen F. Austin High School - Austin, TX (1992 - 1995)
Texas School for the Deaf - Austin, TX (1992 - 1996)
Tarrant County College - Northwest Campus - Fort Worth, TX (2002 - 2003)
Austin Community College - Austin, TX (2005)
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